On Leaving It All Behind

I'm not alone in saying that the last year has been a hard one. We've all had our things.

People have left, people have been lost. Relationships have been strained, and at the end of the day, I've felt alone in a lot of it. So it goes, eh?

But here's where I need to make a change. I need to leave it behind. I need to do something, anything, to deal with what I haven't been dealing with.

I remember quite distinctly finding out when both of my grandparents had passed away. Each time I was somewhere different, on my way to some event, and both times I followed with an utter breakdown. I can logic my way through loss as much as I want, but at the end of the day, no matter how much sense it makes on paper, I still can't wrap my head around it, not really.

I'm still not sure I believe that there are people I will never see again, never hear laugh again, never make smile again.

I'm still not sure.

So, as both a favour to my family, and perhaps even moreso - a favour to myself- I'm going to be going through and cataloguing all of my grandparent's old photographs. There are about a dozen photo albums crammed full of memories, of things I'd forgotten, things that happened before me, things that I never knew happened at all.

I know it's not going to be the most fun experience, but I'm just hoping that with it will come some sense of closure, understanding, or... I don't know. Something. Anything?

I'm still not sure.

"I know people say life goes on... and it does. But no one tells you that's not a good thing."